Jiri Bubla / Vlad Krutov

V 1
I get three fifty k
to just show up and play
been three weeks since i lst scored
and yet i still don't ask for more

V2
I don't give a shit
if i even get a hit
cause my agent called me again today
and told the check clears either way

Chorus
Hot dogs and vodka
Wash it down with beer
smokies and caesers
i've never been so clear

Hot dogs and vodka
half dozen before each game
gimlets with hoagies
maybe thats why i'm so lame

V3
Sometimes I'll admit
that i've done some crimes
stole a smokie from the cart
at granville street and vine ...

Bridge 1
In fact, i've thiefed em
a couple dozen times
they hard it over
it just ain't that hard
i load it with relish
and they ask for my two-nie
and by then and eating my napkin and my lord i am running
i'm running, running, running ...

Bridge 2
Now here i toil
broke, sad and turmoiled
thinking of all the kids i let down
i sweep up your mess
and you can't hardly guess
that i use to skate on that ice

V4
But it really don't matter
if i get any fatter
i can still sweep the wreckage
from the coliseum aisles

V5
When they came out to scout me
they should've looked more closely
and discovered my true ambition
ahh the beers, ... they steal all my affection